Last Monday I pulled into the grounds of what would become my home for the next 4 1/2 days.
My surroundings couldn’t have been more plush, more beautiful, more bio-diverse, or more fit to my liking ☺
This is a picture of the grounds of the ashram
Here’s a nearby waterfall that you can hike to directly from Isha
But who I was when I got there…well…she was a bit of a mess.
You see, I’d let ‘it’ get away from me again.
I was in such “go, go, go” mode…
★ Making endless lists (and checking them twice).
★ Letting my work-life, roles, and obligations consume me. (There had been no ‘on’ or ‘off’ switch in sight for a while.)
★ Always connected or plugged in — never more than a few moments of me going without checking that cycle of facebook, gmail, my texts, the weather (Cue: endless activity loop)
Not only could I FEEL that my body was tired, inflamed, and needed a bit more focus and attention on my own ‘positive rituals’…
But I could also FEEL that my attention span was all over the place, I wasn’t running my life (or spending energy) efficiently, and I needed a bit more grounding and focus.
I had lost that focus on ME.
I had lost that part of my self-care where I slow down, replenish, recalibrate, and ‘oil my joints’.
And for whatever reason (or whatever intuition popped in my mind), last Monday I woke up early, drove all day, and ended up in McMinnville, Tennessee at the Isha Center for Inner Sciences before sunset.
Truth is, I had NO IDEA what I had ‘signed up’ for before I went. I had no idea what to expect or what would take place during the course of that week.
But for whatever reason, SOMETHING inside of me got myself there.
Upon reflection, I truly think that my subconscious mind was DYING for some sort of intervention!
And if I needed to drive to the middle of nowhere with no internet or cell phone connection and live at an (amazing) ashram for a few days, so be it!
I’ll save all the details for another time, but I will share this:
Who I was when I left was a completely different version of myself than the version that arrived.
★ I felt lighter.
★ My skin felt lighter.
★ My eyes felt lighter.
★ I walked lighter, talked lighter, and my energy was lighter.
★ I felt like I was finally switched to the ‘off’ position…but I also felt rejuvinated and ready to press ‘play’.
So the hell happened to me while I was there, you may be wondering?
Well first let me start by sharing what I DIDN’T do — or what was NOT present.
★ There wasn’t that endless electronic feedback loop and incessantly checking in with my means of communication. No mindless ‘researching’ (“Oh I’m not sure about that, let me Google it!”), seeking, consuming, or extracting of information from the palm of my hand like a feeding tube into my brain. Or using technology as entertainment at the end of the day to “turn off my brain” or unwind. This was an unplugged environment.
★ There wasn’t any focus on work, to-do’s, obligations, or agendas. I had ‘cleared the space’ before I left with my clients and loved ones, and had peace of mind giving myself permission to “not get anything done” while I was there. I was able to shut out the chatter of all of my commitments, duties, and all the ‘doing’ going on in my life.
★ There was no thinking or making decisions about food. All the mealtimes where scheduled, prepared by the staff, and deliciously wholesome and hearty vegetarian food. I just showed up at specific times, and ate as much as I wanted of what was provided. No stress, thought, or contemplation necessary.
Here’s what WAS present:
★ Rituals and routines. The meal times were set, and the ashram had a daily schedule — all optional activities or rituals of the community that you could partake in as you wished. Twice a day there was a gathering of people in certain spaces of the campus for your own meditation practice. And other various ways to engage or interact. So I had a couple of ‘bookends’ in my day that gave me the structure that I desired, but the freedom I also desired (in between).
★ Nature. Not only was Isha centered in one of the most bio-diverse parts of the country (yes the leaves were already changing — lush green with hits of red), but you were situated in nature itself. To get from my cabin to the dining hall, it was a beautiful walk in nature. Then to get to the meditation spaces, another beautiful walk. Not to mention there were several beautiful (well-marked and easy to follow) trails that you could take and TRULY get a taste of the uniqueness and beauty of the nature around. A BIG change from sitting and working (mostly) indoors and in coffee shops.
★ Meditation/Breathing/Mindful Movement. I’m not gonna lie: it didn’t hurt that there weren’t many other forms of my usual entertainment at my disposal. So I decided that it was the perfect time to throw myself into meditation. Scratch that…I made meditation my bitch! 🙂 Anyone who knows me knows that I’ve been ‘trying’ to meditate for a couple of years now, but the typical forms of meditation never truly resonated with me. Until Isha. I was able to successfully find meditation there. There’s a few different kinds that I learned while I was there. And all of which “worked” for me and I’ve been able to successfully recreate on my own. I am really happy about that.
★ A feeling of oneness with myself that I haven’t really created up until now. The first 24 hours of my time there was tough for me. It took me a good part of that time to simply allow myself to turn my brain off, relax, and just go with the flow. I realized how addicted I am to always DOING, and it was really interesting just being WITH myself. I don’t do that much. Upon reflection I realized that (in ways) I’ve been outright avoiding it. Drugging myself with social media, Netflix, and even work. We all have our ‘shtix” (and it’s not all ‘bad’ perse), but I’ll be the first to admit that sometimes use it as a distraction so that I’m not alone with myself. But even in just a few days, I feel like I learned (or am learning) to be with myself. As in really sit with myself and just be.The ‘vibe’ of the ashram was so unique. Everyone there respects (and probably wanted their own) internal bubble of thoughts and meditation. But then a couple times a day you would all come together. And you get to be with yourself in this consecrated space…together as a community. Alone yet together. Never experienced anything quite like it to be honest.
So what’s the nutshell version of what I’m sharing with you?
Sometimes you have to drown out all the noise in your life…and make room for some music.
Do you need to drive to the middle of nowhere, Tennessee to make that happen? Absolutely not. In fact I’m finding it easier and easier to connect with myself and my breath no matter where I am or what’s in the background.
But what I do think needs to happen is this:
You’ve got to take a STAND for yourself. You must create the space for whatever it is that you need.
For me I simply needed to unplug, disconnect from all the ‘noise’ in my life, and connect back to me. For me I needed to DO less, BE more.
Again self-care is personal, and whatever you personally need will always be personal to you.
But you do need to carve out the space and the time for YOU!
And it can be in small 5-10 increments of time each day. But it DOES need to happen.
If there is ONE lesson you can learn from my experiences though, it would be this:
Don’t wait until you’re burnt out, overwhelmed, or fried to give yourself whatever you need. Don’t let it get to that point of quiet desperation.
Start tuning in to YOU. Do a constant ‘thermostat’ check within yourself, and give yourself what you need as much as you can, whenever you can.
It’s possible to drown out that noise and let a lil’ music back in…every single day. ♥
